Dallas Cowboys get Chemotherapy

"The Cancer" has been removed from Dallas.

The Dallas Cowboys have released controversial wide receiver Terrell Owens, sources told ESPN's Michael Smith late Wednesday.

Not only did Owens have relationship issues with quarterback Tony Romo and tight end Jason Witten, but the receiver consistently criticized offensive coordinator Jason Garrett's play calling and his offensive schemes to the point that sources have said Garrett did not believe they could coexist.

Philly learned the hard way and so did Dallas, who's next? Actually let's have a little fun; instead of having a poll on who will be T.O.'s next team let's vote on who's the most unlikely team, shall we? Your choices are San Francisco, Philadelphia, Miami (Parcells), or Kansas City (former Dallas OC Todd Haley).

Who is T.O.'s LEAST likely new team?
	San Francisco
	Philadelphia
	Miami
	Kansas City
pollcode.com free polls

Should I stay or should I go?

According to Michael Maybin the answer is 'go'.

Penn State defensive end Aaron Maybin will declare himself eligible for the National Football League Draft on Tuesday, according to his father, Michael Maybin.

Aaron Maybin, a graduate of Mount Hebron High School in Ellicott City, Md., will return to his high school on Tuesday afternoon to give a motivational speech and declare for the NFL at that time, his father told The Patriot-News on Monday.

I'm very sorry to see Aaron go, but I wish him the best. I tailgated beside Maybin's family when he was redshirting his freshman year and they are great people. He's very blessed with a lot of athleticism that will get him a nice paycheck in the NFL and I can't blame him for going. Good luck Aaron, Nittany Nation thanks you for all your hard work.

We're All In Agreement, The Biggest Joke Of The Draft Was...

J Leman went undrafted!?! Connor falling to the third round was bad, but this is unforgivable. Just so we all know, it's now official the NFL hates America.

How can you resist this face? America hates you right back, NFL.

Zack Mills, Tony Johnson Get Up Off Couches, Wait By Their Phones

The 49ers are trying to get the gang back together by signing Bryant Johnson to again team up with Michael Robinson. Zack Mills and Tony Johnson are eagerly hoping their opportunity to take the field again isn’t too far off. Reached for comment, Mills said:

I’ve finally been able to recuperate my shoulder and I’m ready to get out there and back into the groove with those guys.

Added Tony:

I’ve mostly been laying around at Larry’s house, eating Funyuns, trying on his watches and jewelry when he goes out, but that just means I’m fresh. My body hasn’t been taking the pounding over the last several years that those guys have. Sign me up, lets do this thing.

Yeah, I still wear this all the time, Lynn. You got a problem with that? I’m pathetic?! You don’t you even work for ABC anymore, why are walking around with a microphone?

Draft Recap

Like most football junkies I spent the better part of the NFL draft at where else? My favorite bar surrounded by all the other local "experts". The following is a summary of my thoughts and some of the running commentary.

Pick #1 – Oakland: JaMarcus Russell (QB-LSU)

Could have bet the farm on this pick, suck on that Quinn, you're girlfriend's ugly.

Pick #5 – Arizona: Levi Brown (OT-Penn State)

Wow, brother just made some big bucks. Cha-ching. Left tackle must be really thin for him to go this high, Penn State pride at all time high.

Pick #9 – Miami: Ted Ginn Jr. (WR-tOSU)

WTF?!? Ted fucking Ginn?!?! If you would have told me a 5'11" wide receiver would go 9^th in today's NFL I would have called the men in the padded truck to come pick you up. Miami Dolphins/Michigan fan at the end of the bar is livid and denounces his allegiance to the Dolphins, hilarity ensues. I think Brady Quinn is going to cry. His girlfriend however is starting to look hot to me.

Pick #15 – Pittsburgh: Lawrence Timmons (LB-Florida State)

Damn, this was the first real chance that Poz could have been selected but no one really thought he'd go this high. Getting a little anxious for Poz, and drinking way too much way too fast.

Pick #20 – New York Giants: Aaron Ross (CB-Texas)

Giants fans demand silence from bar as the G-men announce their retarded pick – everyone laughs. Give me a break, the horrible need at linebacker and offensive line and they go with corner. Personally I'm getting seriously anxious for Poz and seriously drunk. Is Brady Quinn back from taking a dump yet? Suck on it big guy. Quinn's girlfriend is now a babe!

Pick #22 – Cleveland: Brady Quinn (QB-Notre Dame)

Congrats Brady, you're going to the quarterback graveyard that is the Cleveland Browns. At least you can feel good they took brick wall Joe Thomas ahead of you *snicker*. The look on your face is priceless, almost as good as Leinart's last draft. Getting way to drunk – Brady's girlfriend is now a supermodel to me.

Pick #24 – New England: Brandon Meriweather (FS- Miami)

Meriweather?!? This was supposed to be the team high on Poz! You know, team player, stand up guy fits in to their system and they needed a LB so they take a Hurricane?! I'm now officially worried Poz won't be a first rounder and I'm officially drunk.

Pick #25 – Carolina: Jon Beason (LB-Miami)

Beason?! What the HELL!? Carolina can kiss my ass, the whole NFL can kiss my ass – whoever picks Poz is my new team and the rest of the NFL can blow me. I hate Carolina.

*End of First Round*

Now I'm just a miserable drunk pissed off at the world.

Pick #34 – Buffalo: Paul Posluszny (LB – Penn State)

Wooo hoooo! I'm a billllss flan, fluck the rest of the mfl *sound of head bouncing off bar as I pass out*

*End of draft for me*

Angry girlfriend escorts my drunk-ass home.

The rest of the story

Pick #81 – New York Giants: Jay Alford

Bit of a surprise here, I didn't think Alford would go this high and I'm not sure if Giants fans were too happy about it. Again, I think the Giants had more pressing needs, but good for Alford.

Pick #90 – Philadelphia: Tony Hunt

Damn it, now I have to hear it from Philly fans and I know a lot of them. Most Philly fans I know aren't PSU fans so I'm damned if he does good and damned if does bad – either way I'll take a lot of crap. In all honesty I believe it's a great pick for the Eagles, they need a big back that can run straight ahead and pound out tough yards. I think Tony fits that description pretty well.

Pick #164 – Carolina: Tim Shaw

Mike from BSD was shocked to see Tim go this low but I wasn't, he's a bit of a wildcard from an NFL standpoint. The guy went from Runningback to Linebacker to End and didn't excel at any one of them. Sure he was a team leader and did pretty good at LB and End but he didn't have eye-popping numbers. I'm sure a lot of scouts were impressed with his 40 time but that alone doesn't get you a big contract in the NFL.

Conclusion

All in all, not a bad draft for the former Nittany Lions, I think Poz will get a shot to play right out of the box and Arizona is going to rely heavily on Levi. The rest – only time will tell.