Friday, March 14, 2008

Penn State finally beats Michigan in football...

...stadium size that is!

The University of Michigan has reached a settlement that ends the lawsuit over Michigan Stadium's accessibility to disabled fans — and, for the time being, will end the Big House's reign as the largest football stadium in the country.

Because wheelchair-accessible seats take up about 12 times as much space as normal seats, the changes will also drop the stadium's seat capacity from 107,501 to an estimated 106,201 for the 2008 and 2009 seasons. That will make Michigan Stadium the second-largest football stadium in the country after Penn State University's Beaver Stadium, which holds 107,282.

So... all this time Michigan's been struttin' around the Big Ten claiming to be the "biggest." Now we find out somebody's been exaggerating their girth a little. Well step back John Holmesy, there's a new sheriff in town and our junk is 100% real, not like your artificially inflated size. I'm sure the ladies will still flock to you at parties and stuff but they'll look at you with a crooked smirk because they know the truth, they KNOW who the big man is.


3 comments:

Paterno Lives! said...

"our junk is 100% real"

that's good writing.

Jeff Seemann said...

Wait a minute, hold the phone....I understand the wheelchair accessibility part.

But I've been in Michigan Stadium before. And I can testify ithout a shred of doubt that the University of Michigan does EVERYTHING in their power to provide access to the disabled EVERY SATURDAY.

As soon as they open the gates, 107,000 mentally challenged people enter.

Case closed.

Galen said...

Jeff,

A thousand yuengling lagers for you sir!

Paterno lives! - I learned the word "junk" and other hip words from my good freind spud McKenzie. We're tight like that now that he doesn't hate me and all.