Friday, February 27, 2009

The Intertubes R weird: Exhibit B: TNL’s official plan to die

At some point in every guy's life one realizes that we aren't going to live forever. Usually this revelation is followed by dumping your girlfriend/wife, buying some completely frivolous toy (like oh, I don't know a motorcycle) and running off to some Caribbean island with someone 10 years younger than you. Hypothetically speaking, of course… that's not really my life. Not at all. *cough*

Anyway… a midlife crisis is just nature's way of dealing with the unknown because none of us really know when or how we are going to die. But if we could choose our final destinations, if we could pick how we go out; I can't think of a better way that this:

A Russian man died after guzzling a bottle of Viagra to keep him going for a 12-hour orgy with two female pals.

The women had bet mechanic Sergey Tuganov $4,300 that he wouldn't be able to follow through with the half-day sex marathon.

But minutes after winning the bet, the 28-year-old died of a heart attack, Moscow police said.

"We called emergency services but it was too late, there was nothing they could do," said one of the female participants who identified herself only as Alina.

Key points: he won the bet and it was with two women. Dying of a massive heart attack after snogging two horny women for 12 hours is tops on TNL's official plan for the end and I can't think of anything that will beat it out at the moment. The fact that this is news proves that men are still in control at the switch at news agencies across the internet.

Now if you'll excuse me, it's a nice day in central PA I'm going to go for a bike ride and then finish packing for my trip to Jamaica in two weeks .

5 comments:

Mike @ ZN said...

So Galen, how old is she?

Galen said...

Actually I lied, she's 13 years younger. 22 don't do the math I'm getting close to 'old', let's leave it at that.

JeremyInDC said...

I don't know. If this was with two totally nasty skanks, it doesn't seem like much of a bet to win.

However, two fives are as good as a ten.

Galen said...

Let's look at it this way, the two "ladies" in question bet this dude, that means they must have been serviceable at the worst, because he knew what he was getting into and let’s face it two fives at the same time are better than one ten. Now if they were two tens I can understand the heart attack.

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