Matt Hayes has painstakingly (read: threw darts at a dartboard) ranked all 120 college quarterbacks of Division-IA. He claims "the rankings are based solely on college accomplishments and value to their college teams, not on quarterbacks' pro potential." I have NO clue how one does that buuuut… he took the time to write them down the least we can do is make fun of him. Here are some of the more notable rankings:
1. Pat White, West Virginia
2. Tim Tebow, Florida
Really? Tim Tebow worse than Pat White? Let's see college accomplishments: Heisman – doesn't get better than that. Value to their college teams: you could argue a 'push' here at best so how does Tebow end up 2nd?
8. Mark Sanchez, USC
Ok, but really, with all the freakin' talent USC has I could play qb for them and probably succeed.
10. Curtis Painter, Purdue
First Big Ten guy and there's not much argument although I'd rank him a bit higher nationally.
11. Rusty Smith, FAU
Waaaa? Ok, threw for metric assload of yards last year… in the Sun Belt.
12. Kellen Lewis, Indiana
17. Todd Boeckman, Ohio State
Very efficient true, but again with all the talent in Ohio State… Put Boeckman at say… Minnesota, do you think he gets ranked 17th in the nation? Me either.
27. Juice Williams, Illinois
31. Kaipo-Noa Kaheaku-Enhada, Navy
He's not important to his team he's important to college football. His name causes nightmares for would-be announcers everywhere. I can hear Pam Ward's husky voice now: JEESSsuuuss, NOT NAVY.
34. Brian Hoyer, Michigan State
37. C.J. Bacher, Northwestern
43. Daryll Clark, Penn State
Not too shabby considering it's his first year starting but 7th in the Big Ten? I'm guessing by the end of the season he'll be a lot more valuable.
46. Adam Weber, Minnesota
47. Jimmy Clausen, Notre Dame
Ha! That makes me chuckle. Super-can't miss-multiple Heisman winning-coached by the greatest offensive mind ever- 2nd year starter ends up 47th behind a Minnesota QB - suck on that ND fans.
71. Andrew Robinson, Syracuse
Anyone scared of Syracuse this week? Didn't think so.
72. Allan Evridge, Wisconsin
74. Nick Sheridan/Steven Threet, Michigan
Would have been Terrell Pryor's position but… Oh I'm sorry Michigan fans, too soon?
82. Jake Christensen/Ricky Stanzi, Iowa
Congratulations Ricky Jake Christensen Stanzi you are last in the Big Ten.
108. Adam DiMichele, Temple
Yikes, is Temple that bad?
120. Paul McCall/Wayne Younger, FIU
Look on the bright side FIU fans, all you have is up.